A night off from the Goo Goo Ga Ga

on Wednesday, July 23, 2008

It's Wednesday morning and I'm basking in the fact that I actually went out on a date with my wife. The train that is the goo goo ga ga is nice to step down from once in awhile. But as with most parents that "sneak" away for some alone time, the conversation is always dotted with thoughts of our kids...as it should. They are such treasures in our life. We go through what all parents, we are finding, go through to some degree. The listening issues. The power issues. The struggles to get them to eat. The struggle to just get them in harmony about taking a wagon ride together. But if you itemize the time spent with this struggle. It really is a short percentage of our time. The goo goo ga ga train usually flows well. It just happens unfortunately when we are the most tired and have the most trouble focusing on the underlying reasoning behind the behavior and addressing it. The wife and mom sent me a video today of a lady that said that the first thing you think you want to say to your child should be shelved...particularly if it is going to be a negative response to a behavior. Rather you should look to the underlying reason for it. It is so true. I'm ashamed to say that I don't practice this as much as I should. I am usually slow to anger, but I am finding myself with a short fuse when it comes to my children. I have to remind myself that they are young children and do not have the capacity for moral clarity at this time. And to expect that is foolish. Not sure that I developed that trait till I was in my 20's. Things like please and thank you were not really in my vocabulary. It wasn't till I was in maybe my 20's that I had an epiphany on the subject. It was right to think of other people’s feelings. It was right to open doors for ladies, and anyone else for that matter. It was right to be thankful for everything thing that was given to me. To expect our little ones to grasp this totally at their age is setting too high a bar. The best we can do is to shape them. Our children do say please, they do say thank you, they do listen to us....some of the time :) It is our job to continually discipline. And disciplining not in the common usage. The Webster's usage tells us that disciplining is "teaching" "molding" not yelling and screaming. I do ramble but I am striving to be a better dad that does what we continually request from our children....LISTEN to them.

As you can see, even on a fabulous evening with my wife, our thoughts continue to be on our beautiful, thoughtful children.

BTW...Indian Jones last night was a fun movie. Lost both of us a little when the aliens appeared ...lol. Daddy's back on the Goo Goo Ga Ga.